Sometimes, the grass isn’t always greener on the other side. Way back in 2nd grade, I had the worst teacher I could have ever imagined. I was in a classroom with lots of bullies and the teacher was the biggest one of them. As if the daily stress as a 7 year old facing this wasn’t enough, this was also the year that our school decided to start implementing various arts classes which meant music. I’m all for arts…I’m all for music…but as a little kid being sent to a strange classroom in an outside building with the most scary looking music teacher (think the beast on beauty and the beast) was more than I could handle. He was very tall, with no smile and the wildest hair I’d ever seen. I just couldn’t take a step further from the fright and I ran to the teachers aid and just bawled my eyes out. She was the one source of comfort in that whole rotten year.
Eventually, I overcame that fear and realized that this teacher would not be locking me away in a dark dungeon forever and I’d get to go home soon. Slowly, that biggest fear of the day became more tolerable and I do have a solid positive memory from that class I remember today.
We learned the song Turn Turn Turn that year for our end of year concert. I guess remembering that song 30 years later means that season of my life wasn’t as full of traumatic repressed memories as I thought.
Turn Turn Turn is a song stemming from Ecclesiastes 3 about the seasons in life. Yesterday, in our church service, the focal scripture was on this passage and those memories started flooding back. I could hear that 2nd grade song being rewound in my head.
Here is something that came to mind that I would like to share with you…an expecting mom who is preparing for an adoption plan.
Seasons were designed to come and go. Nothing lasts forever! For you, I can only imagine how overwhelming this season of life can be. Being pregnant and not in a position to provide for your baby must be weighing heavy on your heart. Ecclesiastes 3:4b says there is a time to mourn and a time to dance. I would venture to say that if you are looking into placing your baby for adoption, some part of your heart is mourning the “what could have beens” with this child. I hope that you find it comforting that after the mourning will come a time to dance. I feel like this serves as a reminder of to hang on tight now, because the season will change and life will get better. I know you long for that moment that better times come your way.
For me, I have been mourning the dream of being a mom. Due to an early hysterectomy, I cannot have a child biologically. That hurts to the very core of my soul. While I mourn this fact, I also feel very heavy-hearted that I have poured so much time, money and energy into the adoption process and am still waiting to be matched. I have faith that soon- the season will change – and it will become a time of dance…a time to praise God from whom all blessing flow…and a beautiful time for me to share with the little life growing inside you.